Sunday, May 08, 2011

Unfailing love

I could not stand her.

Everything I did, she did the opposite. We didn't see eye-to-eye on anything.

I tried. I tried to imagine her point of view but I couldn't.

Irrational. Outspoken. Stupid.

I wanted nothing to do with her.

And then, I grew up and became a mom.

I cannot stand the way I thought of her then.

Everything I did, I would cringe to see my daughter do. I imagine not seeing eye-to-eye with my kids and it hurts to remember my own disrespect.

I pray. I pray that I will learn from my relationship with my mom.

Prayerful. Driven. Smart.

I want more than I had with my mom when I was young.

And then, I realize, my mom has not changed.
I changed.
Despite everything- everything I was and I am trying to be, she has always loved me. She did not give up on me. She keeps on loving me day in and day out.

Stunned. I recognize, I want to follow the example of my mom. I will love my kids day in and day out, no matter what they become and no matter how they act.

Thank you, mom, for your unfailing love.


sharon said...

Amazing what a little perspective and maturity will do. It's hard to believe you were ever that way with your mom when I see pictures of her visiting and the hugs and smiles. I'm so glad you have a neat relationship now and that she loved you through your youthful attitudes! Fun that you can share your experience of being a mom with your mom.

Beth E. said...

Such a beautiful post! I went through similar issues with my own mother, and she is such a dear! I agree with Sharon...perspective and maturity are true eye openers!