Relationships are tricky. That's not news to anyone. I spent the day dealing with arguing kids. It was exhausting. Then, after some relaxed family time this evening, something changed and everything changed. Really, probably, we all got tired and didn't realize that's what was happening. I hate when something negative happens at the end of the day. It takes over the feeling of the day. Its just what happens sometimes. I know it happens to everyone sometimes but it sucks. It sucked tonight. How eloquent of me, I know. Anyway, so, I went back outside and sat by what was left of the fire. It was calming. Being outside is always therapeutic. The fire was out but the logs were still simmering. I was warmed by the heat of the red hot logs that were left.
I wanted to find a lesson in this...some bit of wisdom taken from my moments by the burned out fire. The fire was out but the heat was still radiating. I thought it reminded me of our night. The happy feelings were gone but the love felt earlier in the night was still there. Relationships are tricky. Feelings are fleeting. I want to be able to look past the fleeting feelings and see love. But that isn't easy. Feelings deeply affect relationships, even if it is just for a night.
I know I need to go deeper.
That's a good place to rest tonight.